Apa yang sebenar-benarnya penting untukku?
Apa yang sebenar-benarnya aku inginkan?
Apa dan bagaimana realitaku yang sebenar-benarnya?
Stories of Universe's Traveler | Feel,Observe,Think |
Mungkin dahulu setiap merasakan hal-hal gak enak atau muncul pikiran kesadarana akan sesuatu, selalu di denial dan diabaikan. Hingga akhirnya seiiring waktu mengalami banyak hal, bertemu banyak hal, termasuk banyak hal terungkap, baru lah sadar sesadar-sadarnya: ternyata semua yang dirasakan dan kesadaran yang dulu muncul itu benar, valid.
Through the tapestry of countless years, a profound truth has emerged from the shadows of my heart: what I truly yearn for in every bond, every friendship, is a harmony of consistency and stability, wrapped in kindness. Consistency is the gentle rhythm of a steady hand, the unwavering melody of words spoken and deeds done, where I am cherished with unchanging grace, regardless of the storm. Promises spoken become sacred oaths, never to be broken. Stability is the calm, enduring presence, a steadfast anchor in the tempest, untouched by the tumult of emotions, harm, or chaos.
I have come to understand that consistency and stability are not mere virtues but the alchemical elixirs for healing the deep fissures within the nervous system and neuroplasticity. Consistency and stability indirectly provide a sense of safety, security, certainty, order, clarity, trust, and a healthy connection in personal growth and relationship.
Many people might think that marriage is a solution to all problems, a shortcut. As a result, there are those who judge individuals who consider marriage as a mere "shortcut."
For someone who is used to being alone, has trust issues, a lot of trauma, frequently betrayed, distrustful of others, closed off, often abused, harmed, lacks a secure place, has no sense of belonging, feels ignored, and holds false beliefs about being unworthy of love, the barriers to letting someone in are high. Not just for marriage, but even forming friendships can be distant.
When all these issues are healed, and one realizes that marriage is a way of loving oneself (a need for love, companionship, sex, bonding, connecting, etc.), then the desire to get married can be seen as an achievement. It reflects that the person has started to trust others, is beginning to let people into their life, feels worthy of love, is willing to be somewhat dependent on others, is ready to commit, feels settled and comfortable with themselves, understands that life cannot be lived alone (that there are roles and contributions from others), and is starting to learn and accept (transformation of masculine energy to feminine energy).