From many conversations with various people, I unconsciously reflected on what I likes and dislikes, what's acceptable and what's not, until I realized something:
- I can't get close to more than one person even if we just met or are getting to know each other.
- If I'm not initially interested, no matter how hard someone tries, it won't change anything.
- If a relationship ends, done is done. There's no going back, no playing/ dating/ having intimate with exes, no reconciliation (back together).
- I'm not the type to be overly infatuated, especially to the point of not using my brain.
- I can't do casual sex or undefined dating with multiple people when men do the same with multiple women.
- I've already decided something from the beginning (as friends or partners) and it won't change.
- I have to be the one who likes first before anything happens.
- I am very committed and loyal.
Actually, from the beginning, when you meet someone, you can already see how they are, including their future, even sensing their sexual vibes, etc. So there's no need for the language of "getting to know each other first," "trying it out first," because I already know. Why bother if the ending is already known and doesn't align with personal goals (serious relationship, commitment, etc.) ?
Anyway, so far, my intuition has been right, proven.
On the other hand, such a mindset discards the opportunity to enjoy and have fun in the midst of it (the process). Like from the beginning, knowing I won't marry that person, it could open up other things during the closeness process (in the middle) that benefit oneself (insight, pleasure, networking, etc.). Hmmm...
Then comes contemplation again, how and where to meet like-minded people with similar values and rules? Because many people (almost everyone) I meet, and the majority in society, are the type who want security, don't want to lose, and avoid risks. Such as getting close to several opposite-sex individuals during approach, dating multiple people simultaneously, being able to have casual sex without feelings, and even while in a relationship, still open to finding someone else considered better; never settling down, always searching, and keeping options open. The same applies to marriage, with the potential for divorce when needs are unmet and marrying someone who can better fulfill those needs (financially, sexually, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually).
No comments:
Post a Comment